Thursday, September 21, 2006
I would like to think I'm a regular Joe. I like sports. I like music. I like the outdoors. I like the indoors. TV rocks. Movies are great, when they're good. I have the regular number of appendages. What makes me different than every other Joe in the world? One thing is my prized possession in the world. When you ask most people what their prized possession is, they would say a family heirloom, or a car, or something they earned for a spectacular achievement. My prized possession is the oldest thing I own that I actually purchased myself. It has traveled the world with me, and kept the elements from burning, blowing, or washing away my head. My most valued possession is virtually worthless to someone else, unless it is raining or the sun is fierce, or if you are gathering spare change to raise funds for a mate's last trip to the brothel (you're welcome, Noah). My most valued item is a hat. A Notre Dame baseball cap to be specific.
For those of you who have spent more than a few hours with me, you have seen this little beauty perched atop my head. For most of you, you would have made a comment about the ferral state of my beauty. Sometimes, it gets more attention than I do, and thus has it's own personality. To the best of my recollection, I bought this cap somewhere between the ages of 12-15 years. I bought it at a "garage sale" that was being held at the Conference Center in my hometown. Local businesses brought out items to peddle them, and I believe Key Sports were selling this cap, along with others. I'm not sure why I would have chosen Notre Dame at that point, as I would become a fan later in Uni, but I ended up with it. It started out dark blue with beautiful white and gold embriodery. Starter brand...kudos to the Starter company. Bubby bought a New York Yankees hat, which I believe is still in existence, but has not been heard from in a while.
If we back calculate, I have had this hat for somewhere between 16 and 19 years....that's a while.
This hat went through many stages of life from purchase to current day. Primary headwear as a youth, to secondary as I went through my wannabe thug stage in high school (go Westside Whiteys), when it was swapped for a black Raiders and Atlanta Falcons hat. Once in Uni, I added a few other Notre Dame pieces to my collection, as I was a Lou Holtz freak. I even got to go to a home game in Southbend...fantastic! (thanks Tim Krall, wherever you are). In my sophomore or junior year, I alternated this cap with others depending on my outfit. Ball caps are fashion accessories in uni...although I never bought one just because it matched an outfit. At some stage, all the rage were the caps that had been beaten to utter shit. My precious was once again resurrected to primary headwear, as it was pretty haggard by this point due to years of wear. It still looked too new to be old, though. Time to abuse it more. Also to note, I played baseball in college, so I had that hat to abuse as well. This would probably serve as the saving grace for my precious ND cap.
Somewhere along the way (I think in late high school), I cut the lining out of the inside to allow the crown to drop and fit hy head better. That's the first step to breaking a ball cap well...cut the plastic mesh lining material out of the crown. Next, you have to soak the hat in hot water, tie the bill up with rubber bands in a full circle, and hang it up to dry...repeat twice. This goes for all ball caps, unless you are into the new oversized, flat bill look that is ruining hats the world over.
For the rest of uni, I wore a cap almost every day. That's probably why my hair started falling out, especially with this mess of a hat on my head. I'd say ND got about half time wear during the year, full time in the summer. It was finally getting really horrible to look at, like a well worn cap should. After graduating uni, Mr ND became the top dog once again. Everywhere I go, it goes with me, either riding atop my crest, or stuffed in a backpack. It has become virtually impossible to ruin the bill at this point, as I think the repeated dirt and oil infusion has transformed the cardboard into a memory material. Over the last 8 years or so, this hat has been in every body of water I have touched. Every lake, stream, ocean, sea, puddle, river, jacuzzi, and even quite a few showers. For the most part, this is the only washing it gets....quick dip and dry on my head. At this point, I would not even consider putting it in a washing machine. I am convinced it would turn to dust. I do give it a bit of a washing every 6 months or so by wearing it into the shower and soaping it up with shampoo like I was washing my hair. Then hang to dry. Every time I know I'll be doing something really dirty, I throw this hat on. I'd hate to hear the stories it would have to tell...all of the drenchings in water or sweat, all of the sunburns, the mud, dust, snow, grease, oil, rocks, lime, etc etc. This hat has been the consummate trooper, and has been a great companion. At times in our life together, a girl or guy has snatched it off of my head, and I jump immediately to attention. It used to be funny when I was young and my hat was young, but now it's worth fighting over. I'm like Gollum with his trinket....my precious. The funny thing is I haven't had to change the size on the back tabs (that are in horrible shape, but it's good plastic) in many, many years.
I'm sure there are alot of things that make me different from every Joe Blow, but this is one of them. If I am lucky enough to have my ND cap for the rest of my life, I think I would like to be buried with it. That way when I get to heaven or hell (whichever one it ends up being), it will protect me from the angels crapping above me or the rain of brimstone down in Hades.
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